Well I should've worked tonight because I'm sitting here alone in my apartment (Caleb is at David's and Hannah is on a church youth camp in FL) and feeling melancholy. I'm listening to John Meyer for the first time (and hey he is darn good!) and just basically feeling a little anxious. I talked to David tonight and he asked me if I wanted a divorce. I said "I'm not ever getting back together with you". You'd think he wouldn't have to ask, I mean it has almost been 9 months since the big event and I have said it to him multiple times and he doesn't seem to get it. But tonight maybe he did. Who knows. I just want to peacefully get on with my life, no more drama. Meanwhile, I'll just keep plugging along.
One of the things discussed between David and I is moving to Albequerque. We had been talking about this before the big breakup, and I still want to move there. Several of my friends don't want me to, but it would be closer to family and still in the type of climate I like, albeit much cooler than Phoenix. My family/friends have expressed a concern over being out there on my own w/o resources that I have here (like a support system), but I can't live my life in fear of "what-ifs", KWIM? Only a 7hr drive to OKC where Hannah is half the time, and 10hr drive to Dallas where family is. Course cheaper and faster to fly as well as a lower cost of living. Lots of benefits. We'll see.
Well on that note, I think I'll sign off and catch up on some journals.
Ciao! De ;)
PS: I just got an email...and he doesn't get it.
| Your Ex is Dependent |
 Your ex is dependent on others from almost everything - and has trouble accepting responsibility.Your ex is not able to be independent and fears being alone. People with dependent personality disorder feel helpless when a relationship ends and need constant reassurance. Sound at all familiar? |
1 comment:
(((De))) Personally, I think you'd do fine in Albuquerque; I liked that area when we lived in Santa Fe, but that was now close to 10 years ago so a lot changes. I think you would do fine wherever you live; support systems are good but they unravel at times too; being in an area where you can support yourself better with a lower cost of living seems like a reasonable option. Funny thing is, we moved down here, one of our reasons was to be closer to family and we hardly see family, go figure. But at least we are closer in case.
I hope David understands eventually that you are ready to move on with your life; my prayer for you guys is that out of the respect of the love you once shared, like when you got married/had Caleb, that out of respect of that love, that both (and I know you try very hard with this) of you treat each other kindly since you both are "stuck" with each other because of that handsome young man, Caleb.
hugs to you!!!
betty
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